Q: Why is it that I never feel satisfied in life? I’m always feeling that I need to keep doing more. I know I’m a perfectionist and can be super critical of myself. This often leads to me not finishing things I start. If I’m not happy with how things are going, I’ll have a total melt down and switch to something else that excites me. I’m very creative and have the classic artistic temperament to match. I don’t know why I’ve got this empty pit inside. It’s making me unhappy and feeling unfulfilled when I should be grateful for my talents and all the good stuff in my life. I’m moody a lot of the time which I know isn’t good for my relationship. I don’t want to drive my boyfriend away. I have the Sun and 3 other planets in Scorpio in the 5th House. Any advice on what’s causing this and how I can fix it would be great.
A: Desire is central to the Scorpionic life force because it’s how you discover your Self. Desire when channelled consciously, clearly and is aligned with your highest good usually gets you what you want in life. But when your desires are unconsciously driven (meaning you don’t really know why you want what you do) they usually backfire and you end up with frustrations, incompletions, inner conflict, or drama. When your desire is out of whack, you’re constantly searching for new experiences and the next best thing that you think will finally fill you up so you’ll feel satisfied.
Part of what’s creating these dynamics is your Sun, which sits in your house of creativity, squaring your Moon, the realm of deep feelings. You’re a Scorpio Sun so that means you’re naturally more intense than most. When the Sun and Moon are aspected in this tricky way in your natal chart, it usually brings restlessness and constant searching for new experiences. It creates a conflict between what you want and the way you then go about achieving it – because you’re internally out of synch. You need to get your desire, mind and feelings all working well together. Getting centred and grounded on a regular basis is key for you. Meditation, yoga, connecting with nature. Nurturing yourself.
Having a higher purpose to guide you and your creative outputs is also a great way to keep you on the right path so you don’t continuously go off course.
The other aspect in your chart I think relates to your issue is Mars squaring your Pluto. That can lead to letting your emotions run your life and how productive you are. When Mars and Pluto aren’t working well together, you can be creating something amazing, but then turn around and toss the whole thing out because you’re not happy with how it’s going. It’s about learning not to let your negative feelings take over you. You need to embrace the creative process and view it from a more grounded stance. Creating anything is messy, meandering and usually takes lots of finessing. Which requires patience and self trust. To become really good at anything takes years. No one becomes great overnight.
The more you get some self-awareness around what’s bringing on your darker, self-critical moods the less they’ll disrupt your creative projects and life. You then won’t be pushed around inside so much by feelings of dissatisfaction. Creative self expression is vital for you and the perfect channel for you because your energy is so intense. Start placing more value on the richness of experience and creative gifts that you bring to others so you don’t become the eternal seeker.
Astro-Psyche Profiles by Venus Astro – Empower Yourself From Within
